- Claire: [Enters apartment to find her husband and another woman in the living room]
- Eric: Oh, hey, hon. This is my... uh... Candy... This is Candy. You're not at work.
- Claire: I'm not at work. I'm right here.
- [pause]
- Claire: Candy, could you excuse us?
- Candy: Sure.
- [Awkward five seconds goes by]
- Candy: Oh, you mean...
- [points to herself, then leaves]
- Candy: .
- Eric: Ok, now before you get all in a huff, just hear me out, ok? Candy's a new manager's assistant while Dawn's in Anaheim. I'm getting her acclimated.
- Claire: To our home?
- Eric: Yeah, we were in the neighborhood, ok? And I left my laptop...
- Claire: Oh, Eric.
- Eric: What? Claire...
- Claire: Don't tell this to me, Eric.
- Eric: What do you want to hear?
- Claire: The truth.
- Eric: The truth?
- Claire: That you'd prefer spending time filing things in Candy's drawers than home with your wife.
- Eric: You work just as much as I do. Ok, so...
- Claire: This is like your side project, isn't it, Eric?
- Eric: Oh, no, no, no, not right now. Not the big picture speech.
- Claire: Working on it. It's like the bedroom walls that we never get around to re-painting... I mean, what are we doing here?
- Candy: [Sticking her head around the corner] Can I say something?
- [Eric and Claire turn to look at Candy]
- Candy: Actually, I really like the paint in the bedroom.
- [last lines]
- Eve: [on answering machine] Hola, my beautiful sister. It's Eve. Happy belated Easter, for what that's worth, I don't know. I got your message and I think that would be so awesome. Lady, you pick the date, I am there. We'll eat, we'll surf, do everything you're supposed to do here in beautiful Encinitas. Which is, uh, eating and surfing, now that I think about it. Anyway, call me. I love you.
- Eric: [on answering machine] Hey,it's, uh, it's Eric. I just called to let you know I dropped off some o' your mail. Uh, your landlord said he'd put it inside your apartment for you so I just wanna make sure you got it. I hope you're doing OK. Um, that's it. Okay. Bye.
- Claire: Hey, how's your boyfriend? What's his name again?
- Suzanne: Chris?
- Claire: Chris.
- Suzanne: Oh, oh we broke up.
- Claire: Oh, you did? I'm sorry.
- Suzanne: Oh, it's ok. We never really fit anyway.
- Claire: Yeah?
- Suzanne: Um-hum. I mean, we tried to make it work but... he always wanted me to be somebody I'm not. You know?
- Claire: Totally.
- Suzanne: Correcting my grammar. Buying me clothes I didn't like. Putting a pillowcase over my head and bending me over the furniture. I just never got used to it.
- Claire: Hm!
- Suzanne: But, live and learn. Good guy, just not the one for me.
- Claire: Yeah.
- Thom: If you're going past Newark I gotta charge you round trip. I don't make the rules, that's, that's headquarters... You can't go past New Brunswick either, that's, that's corporation limit. In fact, even New Brunswick's pushing it.
- Claire: Will you shut up? I'm not paying you to talk, I'm paying you to drive. That's why I took a cab, so I could sit in the back, while some foreigner who speaks broken English could take me where I need to go!